mo money mo problems

Thank god i start working friday. If not I would have to start selling myself off for parts. My shopping addiction is far too great for only part time work. Come friday I dive into the sweet sweet world of fourteen hour days, and being surrounded by my babies full time. Oh summer months how i missed you!
I think that blonde hair is damaged hair, and damaged hair retains the smell of chlorine. I went swimming for the last few days, and because my hair is so blonde, when i get out of the pool i used special shampoo to clean the chemicals out of my hair... but currently, I smell like a pool... who knows?
Also, my insomnia is back... it is 5am and I am writting a blog about working and smelling like a pool... therfore, if you have a life for me - please let me know.
fin

your kisses taste like honey

I love feist. I have for a very long time, but somehow I always almost forget, and then rediscover her. All of her cds are so beautifully written. She has this way of always writting exactly how I feel. I am a huge loser, I do realise. In any case if you aren't a fan, let me introduce you to her... it is well worth your listening time.

I really enjoy Oscar Wilde. He wrote that it is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious. Isn't that so wonderful and true? I bet its always the tedious ones that think they are the most charming.

Finally, while working at metro today, a very gay man told me he was a hairdresser and that he would do my roots if I would suck him off. He said it just like that. He then told me I had a pair of 'tatas' on me and that they looked good in a shirt that he let me try on that he just bought for his friend. I hope his friend hates the shirt because hes going to drop it off at metro for me if she doesn't want it. I love how crazy gay men always love me. I love how I love them even more.

Oh and a big PS blog readers. I am the proud owner of a pair of gold lame hot pants. I wear them every day... I can't wait to sit by the pool tomorrow with my gold lame bikini top paired with those short shorts.... life is good and gold.

fin!

"oh fuck, we lost Kevin"

My grandfather is a very very funny man, who busts my chops all the time. He has let me know on several occasions that I have two problems, the first being that I am stupid, the second being that I don't listen. All my mistakes lead back to these two things and I get to hear about it. It might sound mean, but it is a huge source of entertainment in my disfunctional household.
To further prove this disfunction, today we all ate lunch together and talked about how we used to lose my younger brother all the time. And it is so true. That kid got forgotten ALL the time. Once my grandmother caught a man walking out of the mall holding his hand... how terrifying is that. The conclusion is that I was so loud that he was just easy to forget.
fin!

stop being a baby michael

I have a much younger brother who took over my old bedroom when I moved to London five years ago. This has left me feeling entitled to half his HUGE closet space since it was once mine. A few months ago I did a huge purge of my belongings in order to downsize my whole apartment in London to the smaller bedroom in my former Dundas house. Unable to part with all my belongings I stuffed usless, but non purgable belongings into oversized bags and stuffed them in the back of Kevin's closet. This morning, I was looking for an old picture, so I pulled out these bags. The first bag falls over and out falls a cowboy hat and anal beads. I guess it should have been embaressing, but it felt almost appropriate. Plus I don't think Kevin clued in. I can count three people that will find this funny! The rest of you ... im normal, I swear.
fin!

is it raining? --- outside?.... umm yes outside.

I am finding myself missing my school life routine. I commute to school with this wonderful girl Monica, and we had the best times spending sometimes close to four hours a day in traffic and usually at least 12 hours a day together. I have never dueted so many 'bad' but AMAZING songs in my life. I got to introduce Monica to the joys of bad hip hop radio, and she rekindled my love of knitting. For 6 weeks on wednesdays we had to actually wake up at 4am to be on the floor in Regant Park by 6:30 ready to go.....those wednesdays were probably the best days of school. Not realizing that people do not funtion at the early morning hourse that we do was the best. One week we actually got mad at the tim hortons on Brant St. for not having 12 different types of muffins for our variety pack at 4:30am. I think i must sound nuts.... but it was a lot of fun... sushi queen on Queen.....the indian buffet for 8.99..... 9pm bed times.... being downtown toronto ar 10pm and realizing you have to be back there in 8 hours and still have an hour long drive home - somehow these were the best times?. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate all this going out time, or my nice weather... but there is definitly something to be said for your school years. And I am liking these victory laps.

i see london, i see france

I have so much underwear it is ridiculous. Actually almost out of control. Why is it then that i never wear it? I got a lesson in going without yesterday evening. I went to a pilates class in short shorts and nothing else.... I spent the entire hour paranoid i was giving the class a free show. In any case it is my resolution to start wearing panties again... horrah!!

In more important and exciting news, I went to see Mr. Brooks tonight. It follows a serial killer and his alter ego through the conflict of balancing a successful buisness and home life, with his need to kill. It was fantastic. Plus Dane Cook is looking good. All in all - definitly worth the 11 bucks.

Tomorrow I drown my sorrows in the clothing pits of forever 21.... be jealous bitches..very very jealous

karma police

Do you believe in karma? or fate? or something more? Its funny because someone I have been working with has been asking me those sort of questions these last few weeks and its really gotten me thinking. Are we it? or is there something leading us outside at exactly 6:11pm today. Of all the times in the world to leave for pilates, i left in that moment. Its funny what we see in those moments... what it changes inside of us..... just seconds can mean so much.
How likely is it that you would see someone at 3 am on a random street .... or rather they would see you doing something they fear the most?
What makes it happen? is it just chance? lately it seems like too many coincidences all at once.

today was the end.
you were the platform.
tomorrow i jump.

fin

count to three and grin

I had a pretty good weekend, Junior Boys, engagement party, and getting called a whore... the usual...

Hamilton is so funny.... while walking from absinthe to pepper jacks on saturday this table full of girls who were trashy hamilton sluts scream WHORES over and over at alana, heather, and I.... oh hamilton how ironic.

i was wearing a scarf ... huge whore.

Anyways, junior boys were amazing, i really really like them a lot - it was a good time.

On sunday I went to an engagment party in toronto for one of my friends (joanna) from London. It was really good to see her. I am very uncomfortable in these settings - mainly because I avoid real world causes such as engagment... therefore I got tanked at 3pm....which made the afternoon that more enjoyable... grey goose and blush wine mix well.... i should know.

After the party bren drove me back to dundas .... best drunk car ride ever... i think i am going to make a habit of drinking in the day light... everything is funnier.... i am funnier.

he loves me... you can tell.

fin!

PMS

the only man that can put up with me


BDOGG says:
maybe i should repeat it again so you can find it interesting
michelle's hips don't lie says:
maybe i should punch you in the side of the head
BDOGG says:
haha no deal

Big Love

Leave it to me to become obsessed with a show on polygamy. I have always had this weird fascination with it - its so weird! so interesting!

All jokes aside, the show is actually very well done, and pretty funny... good story lines...

i love you alluc.org

i love you big love!

I'm not okay (I promise)

I am not too sure how many of you are aware, but I went through this torrid phase of loving boy bands when I was WAY too old to be doing so. Most of the time I feel that I am over this period of embaressment, until I overhear two 14 year olds talking about Gerard Way from My Chemical Romance gettng engaged. What the fuck man, he and I were meant to be. I guess this is for the best... he got way too skinny in these last few months... le sigh. fin :(

Puppy Love!

I feel like such a proud mother ... I picked out my new puppy last night : everyone meet Darwin Dylan Norton

My house is quickly turning into a farm and I think I like it.

I have an engagment party to go to on Sunday, and the couple hasn't registered anywhere, and I am not really sure what is appropriate for an engagment gift because this isn't the shower? oh my ! so many rules! In any case, this party leads to an opened bar wedding, which will lead to michelle being awesome... so all is fair - I am more than sure I will get a good story out of this experience at the very least.

Finally, this weather is gross... i want to be half naked in my thick mid-30s heat... i am wearing a sweater today! a SWEATER.... come on summer you can do it.

fin!

Confessions Of A Futon Revolutionist

I have left myspace in my dust ... faithful blog readers welcome !
I have arrived!

save me to your favourites: www.michelleissassy.blogspot.com

fin